Between tears and terror I write. Between tears and terror I reach for the sky; I bend to the earth. Between tears and terror I chant. Between tears and terror I bow to the four cardinal directions. Between tears and terror I breathe. Between tears and terror I wail, I thrash, I beg, I pray. Between tears and terror I face my innocence and promise “I will not abandon you. I see you. I hear you. I feel you. I believe you.”
The ground I’m standing on shakes. Inside and outside of me tremors. Whatever I reach for gives way. All I can do is fall to my knees. I drop down. Hunker down. I can’t stand it anymore. I can’t stand. I can’t.
The world around me is falling apart. This isn’t an earthquake. This is not a natural disaster. This is a human made disaster. It’s not the earth that is shaking. It’s all the man made structures that are shaking. I look around. The trees are holding up. The ants are crawling, not running. The birds are chirping. In the natural world, I don’t see ‘imminent’ danger.
It’s like the traffic lights went out and no one knows who’s turn it is. Frozen.
I close the door and someone busts it open anyway. I lean against a weight bearing wall and it falls down. I put on the brakes of my car while driving, and it won’t stop. Broken.
Do I replace the door only to have it busted down again? It’s not the door that’s broken.
What’s broken is the human spirit. I know this. When a 13 year old child prostitute is made to be the mother of 4 children, something’s wrong. She’s a child. She’s been violated. Yes. My father, a Sargent Major of the US military, married a child 13 year old prostitute in Germany and brought her here to the USA to mother his 4 children.
Deja Vu? Flash back. Flash Forward. I continue to write between tears and terror.
A broken president cannot govern himself. Something’s wrong.
I know this. It’s why I didn’t have children because I knew I couldn’t parent a child safely. Inside me is a frozen child. I’m in shock. A part of me hasn’t thawed yet to respond to what’s going on right now. I’m in reaction when I see and then hear a child screaming for her mother while the child is captured in a cage.
I didn’t scream as a child. I didn’t bust down doors. I left my body. I held onto my spirit though. I hope I did. I hope I held onto my innocence.
If I could scream, I would scream so loud your eardrums would break. If I could, I would break down the doors that hold these innocent children from their families.
I would break them free.
If I could, I would literally pick up this president and place him in a play pen and stick a bottle in his mouth. I would replace him with a functional adult.
My adult is here now. I’m no longer frozen. With my other eye, I see through the chaos.
Letting someone help you is sometimes the bravest thing you can do.
I’m a phone call away.
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As a published author, I am your writing coach and editor.
As a trained Transpersonal Therapist, I am your soul advocate and Heart Whisperer.
As a facilitator trainer, I help you move forward and stay focused.
As a mover and shaker of authenticity, I help you unleash your tongue and speak your truth from the inside out.
As a trained Transpersonal Therapist, I listen with soft ears. My Soul purpose is to help reclaim intuition as the flashlight to our inner guide.
When I feel heard by someone, it’s like the best hug ever!
Being seen and heard transforms pain into medicine, tragedy into comedy, and death into rebirth.
What others say about Carola’s Shedding Skin Writing Practice:
“Carola’s sweet and loving energy is only surpassed by her ability to tune into a higher channel and by doing so guide you in finding your highest good. She helped me reaffirm a huge life change and especially my purpose for it. It was a confirmation AND an expansion. It was empowering. Knowing this woman will fatten your soul! Thank you x 3! -Aloha”
“Carola’s intuition ability is excellent! Through her fine-tuned listening, she helped me unearth core areas in my personal life that had been unexamined; she supported me to become more empowered and clear.”
“She has a special ability to listen in a way that allows you to connect with your true self. She is a steady, insightful and a supportive guide. Through her skillful leadership I developed confidence in my ability to connect with myself more deeply.”
“Most importantly, I learned how to ‘follow the energy’, to listen for what resonates within me. I feel lucky to have found her and I am more attuned and authentic as a result of our work together.”
I teach what I desire to learn which is how to listen, discern, and respond to intuition.
Carola Marashi M.A. Published Author, Writing Coach, Transpersonal Therapist.
My 30 years of professional experience is primarily Body Based Therapy
What folks say about Carola
“Carola was so perfectly right on and complete. As I look back on the experience now I’m struck that the nature of the communication was not something the egoic mind can really grab hold of and make an action plan out of. (wink!) The message was directly communicated to the heart where it still lives glowing encouragingly. Your open-hearted acceptance and sweet encouragement allowed a natural and easy deepening, and I especially like that you encouraged me to articulate for myself what I had received in the session. Thanks for your openness, your spiritual maturity, and your insightful sharing.”
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